Muffin’s Monday Chuckles! #6😻

Hello to all of you who read my chuckles today! It me, Muffin,😺 back with more funnies to make you laugh! So, here we go…

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THEORIES OF CAT BEHAVIOR

LAW OF CAT INERTIA
A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force, such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.

LAW OF CAT MOTION
A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.

FIRST LAW OF CAT ENERGY CONSERVATION
Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.

LAW OF BAG/BOX OCCUPANCY
All bags and boxes in a given room must contain a cat within the earliest possible nanosecond.

LAW OF FURNITURE REPLACEMENT
A cat’s desire to scratch furniture is directly proportional to the cost of the furniture.

LAW OF CAT COMPOSITION
A cat is composed of Matter + Anti-matter + It Doesn’t Matter.

LAW OF CAT OBEDIENCE
As yet undiscovered.

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I have had a lot of education, but the one thing that has been the most consistently useful in my life is “righty tighty, lefty loosey.”

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My wife told me I was immature. I told her to get out of my pillow fort.

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Why do bees stay in their hives during winter?
It swarm.

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Nephew: “Thanks for that harmonica you gave me — it is the best birthday present ever!”

Uncle: “Well, that is great! What songs can you play?”

Nephew: “Oh, I do not play it. Mom gives me a dollar a day not to play it during the day and Dad gives me five dollars a week not to play it at night.”

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Me: “The kids have not eaten their sandwiches.”

Wife: “Okay, just throw them out.”

[Later]

Me (helping the kids pack a suitcase): “Look, I’m just as surprised as you are.”

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Well, that all for today everbody! But do not forget my daily funnies, another one for tomorrow morning. Have nice week to all of you!

Muffin.😻

©2023 Steve McLeod.