Muffin’s Fun! #62

Hi, hi! Meow, meow! It me, Muffin, and I back again with more funnies for you to laugh about and start your weekend with or end your week with or nearly end your week with depending on how you end your week which is just as bad as beginning of week except it at the end of week instead when some people say end of week is Friday and some say end of week is Saturday and some say end of week is Sunday and I say human people all mixed up and should just say that it week day no matter what day it is and then everyone will be same all the time. That what I say. Sigh. Mew. Here is funnies for today…

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One afternoon a waiter served a bowl of chicken soup to an elderly gentleman. As he turned away to return to the kitchen the customer stopped him, calling: “Waiter!”

WAITER: “Yes, sir, is there something wrong?”
CUSTOMER: “The soup. Taste it.”
WAITER: “I beg your pardon, Sir?”
CUSTOMER: “Taste it.”
WAITER: “But, Sir, I can assure you that the soup is excellent.”
CUSTOMER: “Taste it.”
WAITER: “Sir, the soup was made this morning of the finest ingredients.”
CUSTOMER: “Taste it!”
WAITER: exasperated, “All right, Sir, I’ll taste it.”

Then after a pause he said, “Where is the spoon?”

To which the customer replied triumphantly, “Ah ha!!”

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A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it.

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I was walking past a farm and a sign said “Duck, eggs!” I thought, “That’s an unnecessary comma.” And then it hit me.

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During a test I was administering, I noticed that one of my married students, who was quite pregnant, kept rubbing her side. Before she left, I asked her, “Are you okay? I noticed you were holding onto your side.”

“Oh, I’m fine,” she answered. “It’s just that my baby was pushing his foot up and down my ribs, and it hurt a little.”

“Well, that’s good,” I said, feeling genuinely relieved.

“Yeah,” she continued. “It’s strange. He normally sleeps during your class…”

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Two older women, Colleen and Melinda, who were rivals in a social circle met at a party at their country club.

“My dear,” said Melinda, “Are those real pearls?”

“They are,” replied Colleen.

“Of course the only way I could tell would be for me to bite them,” smiled Melinda.

Colleen responded, “Yes, but for that you would need real teeth.”

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Well, that all for today everyone! Thank you for reading and have very nice weekend to you!

Muffin.

©2024 Muffin McLeod.