Muffin’s Friday Fun! #100

Hi to everyone out there somewhere!😺 Oooo, it big day here for me today. It number 100 for Muffin’s funnies posts!!😻😀 Wow, it really amazing, I never thought maybe I wouldn’t make it this far. Of course, it would have been here sooner but my human lose some of my posts, like on Wednesday. I ask him where is post, he say it missing. I say then look for it, then it not be lost anymore. He say it not lost, it missing. Well, if it missing, then it lost, if not lost, then publish post. He say it not lost but it missing. Well, if it missing, then go look for it so it not missing anymore. He say not able to look for it because it not there. I ask where it not. He say it not nowhere, it just missing. I sit and stare at him and go blinkety blink. He end up with sore leg, but I tell him not to worry, it just missing.😹🙄 Here is funnies…

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At a large corporation, the CEO who was leaving presented the new CEO with three numbered envelopes.  “Open one of these if you run up against a problem you don’t think you can solve,” he said.

At first things went along smoothly.  Six months later, sales took a downturn and the CEO was catching a lot of heat.  Then he remembered the envelopes.  He went to his drawer and took out the first envelope.

The message was: “Blame your predecessor.”

The new CEO called a press conference and tactfully laid the blame at the feet of the previous CEO.  The press and Wall Street responded positively, sales began to pick up, and the problem was soon behind him.

About a year later the company experienced another dip in sales plus some product problems.  Having learned from his previous experience, the CEO quickly opened the second envelope.

The message: “Reorganize.”

This he did, and the company quickly rebounded.

After several consecutive profitable quarters, the company once again fell on difficult times.  The CEO went to his office, closed the door and opened the third envelope.

The message said: “Prepare three envelopes.”

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TEAMWORK means never having to take all the blame yourself.

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Seeing a spider is not a problem:  The problem comes when it disappears.

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One day while driving through a neighborhood near his church, Pastor John saw a little boy on a front porch, struggling trying to reach the doorbell.

Feeling like he needed to help the young fellow, he stopped his car and got out to help. He pressed the doorbell for him and said, in a teaching way, “Now what do we do?”

“Now,” the boy said, laughing, “we run!”

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Kids have a greater need for speed than classroom computers can deliver.

Impatient to turn in his term paper, one restless student kept clicking the “Print” command.

The printer started to churn out copy after copy of the kid’s ten-page report.

The topic?

“Save Our Trees.”

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Why isn’t there a mouse-flavored cat food? (me like to know answer too)😾

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Answers to quiz questions waaaaaay down at bottom of post.

1. Johnny’s mother had three children. The first child was named April. The second child was named May. What was the third child’s name?

2. There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh?

3. How much dirt is there in a hole that measures two feet by three feet by four feet?

4. In California, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?

5. If you were running a race and you passed the person in 2nd place, what place would you be in now?

6. If a farmer has 5 haystacks in one field and 4 haystacks in the other field, how many haystacks would he have if he combined them all in another field?

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That all for today, hope you enjoyed funnies and hope you have very wonderful weekend time too!

Muffin.😽 (Keep going down for answers!)😹

©2024 Muffin McLeod.

Answers to quiz questions!

1. Answer: Johnny, of course.

2. Answer: Meat.

3. Answer: There is no dirt in a hole.

4. Answer: You can’t take pictures with a wooden leg. You need a camera to take pictures.

5. Answer: You would be in 2nd.

6. Answer: One. If he combines all of his haystacks, they all become one big stack.