Muffin’s Funnies! #29

Hi everyone!😻 It me, Muffin, I back again with more fun funnies for your enjoyableness! Notice big long word I use today? My human go shopping yesterday morning like he always does. Except he come home with groceries and go back out again. He have to go see doctor. He going to check head? No, said my human, it all about blood. Stop, not want to talk about blood. He come back after very long time. That long visit with doctor I tell him. He say it short visit, long wait. I ask what his doctor say. She said nothing, he not see his doctor. You visit doctor but not see doctor? He say he did see doctor. You just say you not see your doctor. He say right, not see my doctor. I look at him and swish tail. He scream and run away.😹 Ahem, now, here are funnies for today.

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I went to the house I grew up in and asked if I could go in and look around. They said no and slammed the door. My parents can be so rude.

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IT’S A GUY THING

“I’m going fishing.”
    Really means: “I’m going to stand by a stream with a stick in my hand all day, while the fish swim by in complete safety.”

“It’s a guy thing.”
    Really means: “There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical.”

“Can I help with dinner?”
    Really means: “Why isn’t it already on the table?”

“Uh-huh.” “Sure, honey.” “Yes, dear.”
    Really means: Absolutely nothing. It’s a conditioned response.

“It would take too long to explain.”
    Really means: “I have no idea how it works.”

“We’re going to be late.”
    Really means: “Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac.”

“Take a break, honey, you’re working too hard.”
    Really means: “I can’t hear the game over the vacuum cleaner.”

“That’s interesting, dear.”
    Really means: “Are you still talking?”

“Hey, I’ve got my reasons for what I’m doing.”
    Really means: “And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon.”

“I can’t find it.”
    Really means: “It didn’t fall into my outstretched hands, so I’m completely clueless.”

“You look terrific.”
    Really means: “Please don’t try on one more outfit. I’m starving.”

“I’m not lost. I know exactly where we are.”
    Really means: “No one will ever see us alive again.”

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I made a huge to-do list today.  I just can’t figure out who’s going to do it.

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Well, that all for today everyone. I hope you all have very nice day today, without smoke. It very, very, very smokey here. Have very nicest day! Ooops, I say that already. hehehe!😹

Muffin. 😽

©2025 Muffin McLeod.