For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Hi, hi to all of you on this bright, sunshiny, warm, bemeowtiful, meowvelous Monday!😻 I hope you all doing well today. I back again with more fun funnies for you all to enjoy. He tell me that when he walk past rack of shirts, one shirt jump off rack and onto floor, all by itself. I say he push it off rack. He say he not push it off rack. I tell him shirts not jump by themselves, need help. He say maybe bird push it off rack. I ask if he saw bird. He say no, but he also not see shirt jump off rack, so it possible. That when my ears wiggle and I bite back of leg.😼 He then jump around apartment going wow wow wow wow wow. He say no, he go ow ow ow ow ow. Same difference.😹 Anyway, here is funnies for you…
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A group of women were at a seminar on how to live in a loving relationship with their husbands. The women were asked, “How many of you love your husband?” All the women raised their hands.
Then they were asked, “When was the last time you told your husband you loved him?” Some women answered today, a few yesterday, and some couldn’t remember. The women were then told to take out their cell phones and text their husband: “I love you, sweetheart.”
Next the women were instructed to exchange phones with another woman and read aloud the text message they received in response to their message.
Below are hilarious 12 replies. If you have been married for quite a while, you understand that these replies are a sign of true love… Who else would reply in such a succinct and honest way?
1. Who is this?
2. Eh, mother of my children, are you sick or what?
3. Yeah, and I love you too. What’s wrong?
4. What now? Did you wreck the car again?
5. I don’t understand what you mean?
6. What did you do now?
8. Don’t beat about the bush, just tell me how much you need?
9. Am I dreaming?
10. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, someone will die.
11. I thought we agreed you wouldn’t drink during the day.
12. Your mother is coming to stay with us, isn’t she?
Kinda tugs at the heart, doesn’t it?!
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I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don’t have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?
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I just read a book about the psychology of camping. It was in tents.
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Gravity is studied a lot because it’s a very attractive field.
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If you have ever had to wait in a doctor’s office for what it seems is like an eternity – you will appreciate this story.
A doctor tells the story when he was having one of those days when he wondered whether he should have stayed in bed. He was running late on his appointments and had a headache.Â
He got a surprise when he entered the next examining room. He opened the door with a little less than his usual enthusiasm only to find that his next patient had set him up. He had stretched out on the examining table and taken the sheet provided on the table and pulled it over his body and head and had stuck a sign on his chest that simply stated: “TOO LATE!”
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I am willing to make the mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them.
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Well, that all for today everyone, thank you for reading, I hope you have very good day today!
Muffin. 😽 ©2025 Muffin McLeod.
I told Jennifer not to worry about me because Celestine was looking after me very well. “Oh? How well?” asked Jennifer. I chuckled. “She took time off work to look after me,” I said, “to make sure I didn’t do too much and have plenty of relaxation time.” “Uh huh. Is she pretty?” she asked. “I would say that she is,” I replied. “In that case I don’t have to worry,” she said, “if she’s pretty, then she’ll want someone else, not you.” I’m not sure what she meant by that.
“Well, I better say good bye,” I said, “Tracy is smart and likely has figured out this is a test and she wants to find me first.” Jennifer laughed at that one. “You are probably right,” she said, “sleep well.” “There,” I said to Celestine, “now I have called my wife, is that better?” “Yes, much better,” she said smiling, “you’re doing this to test your team?” “Partly,” I said, “but it also gives me an excuse to get away by myself so I can think.”
“And I’m getting you involved in a mystery,” she said with her head down, “I’m sorry about that, so let’s forget the mystery.” “Never,” I said, “this will still be relaxing for me since you have promised to look after me. And this will be fun, it makes me think of when I first started my PI business with my cat Muffin.” “OH, my cat!” she exclaimed and she ran to the back door and called for Sir Night. I followed and soon a jet black cat came running into the kitchen.
“Poor Sir Night,” she said, picking him up and hugging him tight, “I nearly forgot all about you. Look, we have a visitor that will be staying with us for a few days. His name is Steve and he is very nice.” “Hello Sir Night,” I said, “you are a very handsome cat. Have you had your human for very long?” Meower= “Me live here 2 human months now. Human Celestine save me from big monster dog that want to eat me.” “Wow, she was brave saving you from that monster dog,” I said.
Meower.= “Yep, she throw rock at him and he run away. Then she bring me inside and give me real food and water, not garbage.” “Good thing she had a rock to throw,” I said, “and I’m glad she fed you well too.” “Okay, enough you two,” said Celestine, “go eat your dinner Sir Night while I finish cooking our dinner.” She put him down and he began to eat like he hadn’t eaten all day. Then she turned to me and frowned. “I told you not to read my diary,” she said, “yet you did anyway, that’s going too far.”
“I didn’t read your diary,” I said, “it was Sir Night that told me about the dog.” That’s when she slapped me, rather hard too. Meower.= “Why you slap human Steve man? I did tell him about dog and you throw rock at him. You not be nice now.” “Steve! Did you hear that?” she asked, “He talked! This house is haunted, we need to leave right away!” “No need to be scared,” I told her, “I know it will be hard to believe, but some cats can communicate with people. My own cat, Muffin, can also talk, as can most of the cats we own.”
Celestine looked at me. “For real? Cats can talk?” she asked. She then picked up Sir Night and danced around the kitchen with him. I left and sat in the living room. She soon came looking for me and asked me to stand up. She then hugged me and apologized. Things were back to normal after that. After dinner she let me read the riddle which said, “Check my side and knock on my top, open me up and down will drop”.
I smiled. “I have knocked inside and out on the walls of this house,” she said, “I even went on the roof and knocked all over. The neighbors likely thought I was crazy.” I got up and went over to a cabinet and knocked on top of it. Then I opened one of the top drawers and reached up under the top and slid a piece of wood to reveal a hiding spot and pulled out an old envelope which I handed to Celestine. She opened it quickly but was disappointed to find it was another riddle.
“How did you know where to look?” she asked. “That piece of furniture was often called a sideboard at one time, or, a side,” I told her, “and they sometimes had a secret hiding spot like that. Remember, I’m an Investigator, this is my job.” “I hope there is not too many of these riddles to find,” she said, “it would be terrible if we didn’t find them all before you leave.” “Well, I promise I won’t leave until we find every one of them,” I said.
The next riddle was a bit more difficult, which said, “To climb up to a nice warm place, you first must walk through a deep, cool race, if you are quick you should see my face.” “Hmm, we might have to sleep on this one,” I said, “and tackle it in the morning.” “No, in the morning, after breakfast, we go to the beach,” she said, “that is your relaxation time. I don’t want your wife getting mad at me. Tomorrow it’s the beach, the next day it’s a hike.” She smiled when she said that. It sounded good actually.
She put me in the bedroom across the hall from hers, so I would be close by in case those ghosts came back. I hope they do, I would like to meet them, and throw them out! During the night those ghosts did appear to Celestine again and she came running into my room and jumped into bed with me and hid under the blankets! Sir Night was right along with her! I didn’t even wake up, until the next morning, when the sun shone onto the bed.
That’s when I noticed someone else was in bed with me. Two others, actually, with Sir Night lying right on top of me and Celestine beside me. Waking her up was no easy task. Meower.= “Need to lick nose, like this.” And he did. However, I didn’t really want to lick her nose. It did work though. “Sorry Steve,” she said, “but those ghosts showed up again and I was scared, so I ran in here and hid under the blankets. Guess I fell asleep. I’ll get up and make breakfast.”
After breakfast we went directly to the beach, which wasn’t crowded, yet. Celestine took her diary with her so those ghosts couldn’t read it. She also started counseling me, like she was an actual counselor. I could have gotten the same counsel back home, but there was something different getting it from someone who knew nothing about me or the Investigators.
I needed that, and the way she talked really did relax me. Never once did she jump on me, or judge me, or say I wasn’t doing my duty. She listened and she gave advice, which is what I needed. Finally it was time for lunch and we had hot dogs with fries at the snack place on the beach, then we went back home…
To Be Continued. ©2025 Steve McLeod.