For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
PLEASE NOTE: Muffin’s Fun post is meant to be for humor and is not meant to be taken seriously. Thanks.
Hi, hi to all my human readers!😺 Meow, meow to all my cat readers!🐈 Weekend is over and it now Monday once more time so happy beginning of week and happy day after beginning of week, depending where you live. And if my human even try to explain this again he going to have lots of red spots on both feets. Anyway, we get started with funny funnies now…
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Today more and more cities have red light cameras, to take photos of cars running red lights.
In one particular city, a man received a ticket in the mail along with a picture of himself in a car, running the red light. The fine was $700.
So the man, thinking that this just wasn’t right, got two $100 bills, took a picture of them, and sent in the picture to the police.
One week later he received a picture of a pair of handcuffs. He promptly sent the money that day.
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The brain is amazing. It begins from the time we are born, and works 24 hours a day 365 days a year right up to the time you get up to speak in public.
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Nobody’s a complete idiot. There are always some parts missing.
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A school superintendent, speaking at a city-wide PTA luncheon, assured members that he was always happy to hear from them about problems. He told them, “You can call me day or night, at this number . . .”
Suddenly there was a cry from the assistant superintendent. “Hey,” he exclaimed, “that’s MY number!”
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Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
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Therapy is expensive. Popping that bubble wrap stuff is cheap. You choose.
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I went for an interview at a big IT company today for the position of Computer Hacking Investigator.
The boss asked me, “So, what makes you suitable for this job?”
“Well,” I replied, “I hacked into your computer and invited myself to this interview!”
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Even Popeye didn’t eat his spinach until he absolutely had to.
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First man: I hear the First National Bank is looking for a new teller.
Second man: I thought they just hired a new teller last week.
First man: Right. That’s the one they’re looking for.
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Smile. Keep everyone confused.
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That all for today everyone, I hope you have very nicest day!
Muffin.😽
©2024 Muffin McLeod.
As Majori entered the room laughing, she took hold of the wheelchair and dumped Sky’s body onto the floor, which made her and Carmen laugh even more. Burk then slapped Majori in the face, hard, knocking her over. The man to my right raised his assault rifle, but I raised my cane faster and shot. He fell to the floor, dead.
Boxer then started towards me but Cal stood in his way and with a couple of quick kicks and hits he managed to knock Boxer off his feet, temporarily. Burk disappeared while this was going on. “Joe, get in here!” yelled Carmen, “Joe, did you hear me?” “Sorry Carmen,” I said, “but Joe is sleeping and he won’t be waking up.” “You will never get away with this Steve,” she growled. I pointed my cane toward Carmen.
“You cannot shoot me Steve,” she laughed, “I have no weapon, it would be murder, and you know it!” Cal then pulled out a gun. “Shooting you means nothing to me,” he said, “murder or not. I do not have to play by the rules like Steve. I work for Mr. B.” “Boxer, kill Steve!” This time Boxer knocked Cal to the floor, groaning. “Kat, kill Boxer,” I said firmly. Suddenly Kat was beside me and started for Boxer.
“Where did she come from?” growled Carmen. “I believe it was my parents,” said Kat chuckling. Boxer was fast and hit Kat four times before she could do anything and she fell to the floor. That got Carmen and Majori laughing again. But Kat was back up quickly, not hurt at all. She then kicked Boxer, twice in the stomach, twice on his chest, and he fell against some shelves lining the wall.
He growled and ran at Kat but she easily got out of his way and knocked him to the floor. He got to his feet yelling and swinging his arms but each time missing Kat. She then kicked him 3 more times, knocking him down. He got up, staggering a bit. Kat kicked him again in the stomach, then to his head and Boxer fell to the floor. This time he was dead. Carmen actually looked scared now.
Then a man with a cane came walking in the door with some others with him. Now Carmen looked very surprised. “Mandar!” she exclaimed, “How did you find me? Wait, name your price and kill these people for me!” “Oh my, my, dear Carmen,” he said, “you are a very disillusioned woman indeed. I am not on your side, I am with Steve and his friends. I just wanted to see if it was really you or someone else. It looks like you have finally met your match.”
He then noticed the lifeless body on the floor by the wheelchair. “And who is that poor creature?” he asked. “Sky.” was all I could say. While our attention was diverted, Carmen jumped under the counter beside her. There was a doorway and a slide going into her complex below. The doorway locked securely behind her. Just then Burk returned with the other girls and the cats.
“Where is she?” he asked, looking around. “She got away,” said Cal, “back below.” “You won’t have much time to get away Steve,” said Burk, “you must leave now. Carmen will have 50 men after you in a few minutes.” “You will die first!” yelled Majori as she came at me with a knife. Cal shot her and she fell dead. “I will carry your wife’s body,” said Burk, “I will be gentle.” “Thank you Burk,” I said. We all went quickly to the cars.
Burk put Sky’s body in our car and Jennifer got in the driver’s seat. The other girls went with Mandar and his driver. His team went in their own cars. Kat, Cal and I got in the car. “You better come with us Burk,” I said, “if you want to change, we will help you.” He got in quickly and off we went, fast. “Rock,” I said, “time to move in, get everyone coordinated. Carmen is back in the complex.” “On our way Steve,” he said, “did you get everyone?”
“All but Sky,” I said, “she is dead.” I was okay until that point, then I broke down crying. We all heard Rock yell like a madman, never heard him yell like that before. Cal called Mr. B and let him know it was time to move in and that Carmen had killed Sky. Kat then called Rossana and let her know it was soon time for her to move in as well, and to remember that everyone was working for me.
“Hey, my dear husband,” said Kat softly, “this shoulder is good for crying on.” I put my head on her shoulder. Kat could tell our new friends were a bit puzzled by what she said. “I was married to Steve before,” she said, “until a man named Toledo killed me. But I came back to kill him before he could harm Steve or Sky again. And I did.” “I heard that Toledo was killed by a woman,” said Cal, “so it was you. But I don’t believe in ghosts, and you sure don’t look like a ghost.”
“And what is a ghost supposed to look like?” she asked. He chuckled. “Well, you have me on that point,” he said. Meow,meow?=You not maybe can help human Sky? Maybe? “Maybe,” she said to Muffin, “may I try, dear husband of mine?” I moved over so Kat could sit beside Sky. “Not if it will hurt you in any way,” I said, “Sky would not want that. So please, promise me.” “I promise, my dear husband,” she said smiling…
To Be Continued.
©2024 Steve McLeod.