Chuckles From Chester. #4

Good morning to everyone! It is another chilly morning here. Yesterday it warmed up a bit and snowed another couple of inches (5cm). Now back to the cold. But perhaps Chester can warm us with some of his humor today!

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RULES FOR FREQUENT FLIERS

1.  No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the delay to make the flight.

2.  If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest gate within the terminal.

3.  If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be delayed.

4.  Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.

5.  If you must work on your flight, you will experience turbulence as soon as you touch pen to paper. Or start to drink your coffee. Or try to type on your laptop.

6.  If you are assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the seats on the aisle and the window while you are still in the boarding area. Just find the two largest passengers.

7.  Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to go to the bathroom.

8.  The crying baby on board your flight is always seated next to you.

9.  The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the more carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard.

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I’d grow my own food if only I could find bacon seeds.

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I think my wife has been putting superglue on my water gun collection. She denies it but I’m sticking to my guns.

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I think people who use the wrong word should have the humidity to admit it.

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If I had 50 cents for every math test I failed, I’d have $7.20.

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I don’t think it’s fair that only roosters can start the day screaming.

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That is all from Chester today, he was quite busy this morning sweeping snow off the bird feeder again! Hope all of you have a marvelous Monday and God bless!

Steve, Muffin and Chester.

Β©2022 Steve McLeod.

18 Comments on “Chuckles From Chester. #4

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