Muffin’s Fun! #32

Hi, hi everyone!😺 Happy Monday time to you! I back again with another fun funnies fun time funny post for you to enjoy. If you not enjoy, then let me know and I have BIG discussion time with my human. Then maybe things get better. Might take a while for him to get better though. Sigh. I try so hard to teach him, but he sure is slow learner type human. Today I meow to him that I hungry and he say, “oh, cute kitty, did you have nice nap?” Yes, I have nice nap, but that not what I say, I say I hungry. So I try again. He say, “Oh, you want to play?” Yes, I want to play, but first I want to eat! Then I bite foot and he feed me. Sigh. Anyway, here is funny…

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A man returned from a trip when a big storm hit their town, with crashing thunder and severe lightning. When he got home and into his bedroom at about 2 a.m., he found his two children in bed with his wife, apparently scared by the loud storm. He resigned himself to sleep in the guest bedroom that night. 

The next day, he talked to the children, and explained that it was okay to sleep with Mom when the storm was bad, but, in the future, when he was expected home, please don’t sleep with Mom that night. They said okay. 

After his next trip several weeks later, his wife and the children picked him up in the terminal at the appointed time.  Since the plane was late, everyone had come into the terminal to wait for his plane’s arrival, along with hundreds of other folks waiting for their arriving passengers.

As he entered the waiting area, his son saw him and ran toward him shouting, “Hi, Dad! I’ve got some good news!”

As he waved back, Dad said loudly, “What’s the good news?”  

“Nobody slept with Mommy while you were away this time!” the boy shouted.   

The airport became very quiet, as everyone in the waiting area looked at the man’s son, then turned to him, and then searched the rest of the area to see if they could figure out exactly who his Mom was.

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A sailor didn’t like anything he saw in the mess/food line, so he just picked up a large piece of chocolate cake. The cook asked, “Is that all you’re gonna eat?”

The sailor said, “Yeah, the rest of it doesn’t look too appetizing.”

The cook smiled and said, “Well, in that case would you like two pieces of cake?”

The sailor said, “Yeah, man, I’d appreciate it!”

The cook leaned over and cut the sailor’s piece of cake in half.

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The fact that my body cracks like a glow stick every time I move yet doesn’t actually glow is disappointing.

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Do they allow a loud laugh in Hawaii or just a low ha?

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I hate it when people act all intellectual and talk about Mozart when they haven’t even seen one of his paintings.

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A software manager, a hardware manager, and a marketing manager are driving to a meeting when a tire blows. They get out of the car and look at the problem.

The software manager says, “I can’t do anything about this – it’s a hardware problem.”

The hardware manager says, “Maybe if we turned the car off and on again, it would fix itself.”

The marketing manager says, “Hey, 75% of it is working – let’s ship it!”

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Well, that all for today everyone, I hope you have very nice Monday!

Muffin.😽

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