Steve`s Country
For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Muffin’s Monday Fun! #106
Hi everyone! I back on my Monday spot again. My human and me have discussion about his new way of doing things. I say I not like new way. He say new way is good way, make things easier. I say I not like new way. But he say new way is good, might get new readers. I say I not like new way. He look at me. I look at him. Then I bring out new handy dandy claw sharpener. That something new he ask? I say yep, new way of doing things. He agree that going back to old way is best way. So, here we are, on Monday and here is funnies for today…
======
A customer at Gene’s Gourmet Grocery marveled at the proprietor’s quick wit and intelligence.
“Tell me, Gene, what makes you so smart?”
“Fish heads,” says Gene. “You eat enough of them, you’ll be positively brilliant.”
“You sell them here?” the customer asks.
“Only $4 apiece,” says Gene.
The customer buys three. A week later, he’s back in the store complaining that the fish heads were disgusting and he isn’t any smarter.
“You didn’t eat enough, ” says Gene. The customer goes home with 20 more fish heads. Two weeks later, he’s back and this time he’s really angry.
“Hey, Gene,” he says, “You’re selling me fish heads for $4 apiece when I just found out I can buy the whole fish for $2. You’re ripping me off!”
“You see?” says Gene. “You’re smarter already.”
======
As the crowded airliner is about to push away from the gate,
the peace is shattered by a five-year-old boy who picks that moment to throw a wild temper tantrum. No matter what his frustrated, embarrassed mother does to try to calm him down, the boy continues to scream furiously and kick the seats around him.
Suddenly, from the rear of the plane, an elderly man in a Marine uniform is seen slowly walking forward up the aisle. Stopping the flustered mother with an upraised hand, the white-haired, courtly, soft-spoken Marine leans down and, motioning toward his chest, whispers something into the boy’s ear.
Instantly, the boy calms down, gently takes his mother’s hand, and quietly fastens his seat belt. All the other passengers burst into spontaneous applause.
As the Marine slowly makes his way back to his seat, one of the cabin attendants touches his sleeve. “Excuse me, sir,” she asks quietly, “but could I ask you what magic words you used on that little boy?”
The Marine smiles serenely and gently confides, “I showed him my pilot’s wings, service stars, and battle ribbons, and explained that they entitle me to throw one passenger out the plane door on any flight I choose.”
======
That all for today everyone, have very nice day for all of you!
Muffin.
©2024 Muffin McLeod.
Steve`s Country 
I must need more fish heads!!🎣🐟🐠😂
Nice on Kitten!! 🐈😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Same thing for my human, him needs lots and lots!😹😹
Hey Dusty, nice to see you again, how’s things these days?🤔☕☕🍂🍁
LikeLiked by 1 person
Love the airplane joke!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep, that a goody!😹 Have very nicest day!😺🌞🍁🍂
LikeLiked by 1 person
You too
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanking you!😺
LikeLiked by 1 person
Busy!!
This past week I had my Garage door, furnace and roof replaced. Now I’m waiting on new windows and siding!, ugh…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, you are really fixing up that place! Will you get it all done before heading south?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Doesn’t sound like it. So I’ll need to do everything by phone, then have the final walk through in December when i’m back for Christmas. Not what I wanted but it will have to do.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Well, that’s a lot of major work to do and sometimes trying to get contractors to do things on time can be tough. At least up here that’s the way it is, don’t know what you have found down there. They started certain upgrades in our building back in February that was supposed to be done by April and they still are not finished.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yeah, it’s the windows
LikeLike
I just want to get it sold and move out of this state. I want to find something permanent in the south land. There’s plenty of reasonably priced houses with POOLS! down there.
LikeLike
Muffin, sometimes new is better and be kind to your human. Love the one about the airplane! 🤣
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep, that true, but right now old is better. Me not like changing too much. Change is scary,🙀 me like things to stay same.😻 My human always like things to change. So we compromise, right now things stay same, and later, things will stay same. We both agree with that compromise.😹🙄
Yep, airplane funny is best funny of all!😹 Have nicest day! Send hug to Callie!😻
LikeLiked by 1 person
Muffin, if it works, don’t change it. Callie sends hugs back. 😽
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yep, that what I tell me human, but he always want to change. Oh well. Me thank Callie!😻
LikeLiked by 1 person
😻
LikeLiked by 1 person