For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Hi, hi to everyone! Oh my, I so sleepy this morning. It another cloudy day and they always make me want to sleep more. My human say that too. Except he not do it. I want to sleep on his lap. He want to keep moving around. I can’t sleep on lap if he moving around and doing things. Even when he sit he still not sit still. He keep moving around. Always move arms so he can type and drink coffee and stick elbow in my back or hit me on head with arm or even go oooooooffff in my tummy with elbow. That elbow very bony. So I go to my favorite chair to sleep. Otherwise I get no sleep at all. Oh well, one of those days. It not going to end well for my human, that what I think. Anyway, here is funnies for today.
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Did you know, if you tear a hole in a net, you have fewer holes than you started with? Just one of those important things to ponder.
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Doctor: Are you still taking the cough medicine I gave you?
Patient: No, I tasted it and decided I’d rather have the cough.
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The union workers at the Federal Mint went on strike today. They are demanding to make less money!
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A musical director was having a lot of trouble with one drummer. He talked and talked and talked with the drummer, but his performance simply didn’t improve.
Finally, before the whole orchestra, he said, “When a musician just can’t handle his instrument and doesn’t improve when given help, they take away the instrument, and give him two sticks, and make him a drummer.”
A stage whisper was heard from the percussion section: “And if he can’t handle even that, they take away one of his sticks and make him a conductor.”
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Just had 30 minutes of intense exercise trying to pick up an ice cube from the kitchen floor. Off for a rest now.
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Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
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“I’m sorry,” said the clerk in the flower shop, “we don’t have potted geraniums. Could you use African violets instead?”
Replied the customer sadly, “No, it was geraniums my wife told me to water while she was gone.”
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If a vacuum really sucks, is that good?
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That all for today everyone, have very nice day to you!
Muffin.
ยฉ2024 Muffin McLeod.
Great selection today Muffin
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Me thanking you so much human Sheree!๐น๐บ
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Another great collection. Muffin, I especially enjoyed the dilemma of the striking workers at the Mint. Perhaps I can take cold cash off of their hands.
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hehehehe!๐น Me glad that you liked these funnies human Richard. Guess they not like change at their job.๐บ
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