Muffin’s Fun Time! #7 Happy Valentine’s Day!

Hi everyone! I back again today because today is special day! You know what special day is today? I tried to tell my human what special day is today. He stare at me with blank look on his face. That look is quite normal for him. He have it all the time. Sometimes I think he live in different world than me. I point to flowers he has on table in living room. He not get it. He think I try to tell him they need to be watered again. They do. But that not it. So I touch hand when he lean on table to reach plants to water them. He still not get it. He going to though. He supposed to get me special food today. I not think he remember. I bring in pink flower pot. Not know why he have pink flower pot. He say he not like pink flower pot. So why he have pink flower pot if he not like it? He say it came with flower he buy. Very strange. Anyway, he see me with pink flower pot and he say, “Oh, does Muffin need more water?” He go and get me some fresh water. He just do that few minutes ago. I think his memory go bad. Or maybe it just go. I think that it. Oh well, I try one more time. This usually get his attention. It not do any good, but it fun anyway! Chomp! AAAAAA!!! Now we run around apartment! Wheeeeeeeeeee!! Here is today’s funny.

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Here’s a list of what NOT to give her for Valentines Day:   

– A box of chocolates, clumsily rearranged in an attempt to hide the fact you ate all the caramel ones.

– Flowers from a hospital’s gift shop–or worse, a mortuary’s.

– Poetry, no matter how heartfelt, that starts out “There was once a girl from Nantucket…”

– Any household appliance, power tool or any other item from Harbor Freight.

– Any food item with the words “diet,” “light,” or “high fiber” on the label.

– Any clothing item with the words “push-up” or “slim-down” on the label.

– Anything you could have bought at the gas station mini-mart on the way over, even if you didn’t.   

– An apologetic look and the words “That was today?”

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My wife and I were at my high school reunion.

As I looked around, I noticed the other men in their expensive suits and their bulging stomachs. Proud of the fact that I weighed just five pounds more than I did when I was in high school, the result of trying to beat a living out of a rocky hillside farm, I said to my wife,

“I’m the only guy here who can still wear the suit he wore when he graduated.”

She glanced at the prosperous crowd, then back at me, and said,

“You’re the only one who has to.”

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The worst thing about history is that every time it repeats itself, the price goes up.

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That it everyone, see you again on Monday! Happy Valentine’s Day to you!

Muffin.

©2025 Muffin McLeod.