Saturday Stories, Funny Times! #2

PLEASE NOTE: The following post is for humor purposes only and should not be taken seriously. Thank you.

Good morning everyone! Well, we are back with another Saturday and that means another fun funny post with funny things that happened to my dad over the years. I think there are way more things that happened than I could possibly remember, but I will share as many as I can. One time dad had bought some paint that mom liked and was going to repaint the kitchen. “Are you sure that one can will be enough?” I asked.

“It will be plenty,” he said as he was prying up the lid. “But what if you spill some?” I asked, “You always make a mess.” “Not this time,” he said, “I’m doing this by myself, you won’t be around, so I have nothing to worry about.” “Well, make sure you don’t get paint on the sticker,” I said, “that way if you need more, it’s easy to get the same color.” Dad looked at the can. “He forgot to put the sticker on the can,” said dad. “It’s probably on the bottom,” I suggested.

Dad turned the can over to look, but, the lid was no longer on tightly and it came off. Dad moved incredibly fast, but about half the can of paint was now on the floor. And the cupboards. And the fridge. And spreading out across the floor for about 8 feet (about 2.5 meters). Dad just stared. Mom came along at that point and couldn’t believe what she saw. “Well, you can’t blame Steve this time,” she said. “But, but, he told me to look at the bottom,” dad said.

“I said the sticker was probably on the bottom,” I reminded him, “I didn’t say to look right now.” “Well, you can help me clean up,” said dad. “No, I have something else for him to do,” said mom, and off we went as dad sighed. Another time we were varnishing the kitchen cabinets and had finished for the day, so I wrapped my brush in a plastic bag and tied it tightly so it wouldn’t get hard overnight. “What are you doing?” I asked dad.

“I read where it’s best to keep a brush in water overnight so it doesn’t get hard,” he said. “But it will be full of water tomorrow,” I told him. “I will just squeeze it out,” he said smiling. The next day my brush was fine but dad’s brush looked kind of gummy and dripping wet. “It’s a mess,” said dad, “I won’t be able to use this.” “Mine is just fine,” I said and gave it a small flip which splattered varnish all over dad’s shirt, face and glasses. Mom came along about that time and just shook her head at dad.

“Now you have varnish all over that good shirt,” she said, “why don’t you wear one of the four other shirts you have with paint on them already?” She walked away shaking her head. Dad looked at me and said, “Bonehead.” He used to say that a lot when we were together. Not sure why, but I think it meant he was having fun. “You should probably get that varnish off your glasses quickly,” I said.

A little later our cat came along and ran past dad which caused dad to do a little dance and he spilled some varnish on the floor. “AAAAAAAAA!” said dad. “You spill a lot,” I said, “and scream a lot.” Mom came into the kitchen right then and said exactly the same thing. That caused dad to do his hysterical type fake laugh. That got me laughing. Loud and long. Oh well, guess that will be all for today, this is already quite long. Have a great weekend everyone and God bless!

Steve and Muffin. ©2025 Steve McLeod