For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Hi to all my nice readers on this Monday morning time!😺 I am here with more fun funny time to begin your week with again. Unless your week begin yesterday, then it too late and…MEOW! I not supposed to think about that one anymore! It too complicating! My human and me already talk about it again today. He now busy with bandages. I think he need to buy more today when he go shopping. He should just buy the super duper, whooper whopper extra huge economy size pack that have 50,000 bandages. Then only have to buy once a year.😹 Oh well. Here is today funny times…
======
For two solid hours, the lady sitting next to a man on an airplane had told him about her grandchildren. She had even produced a plastic-foldout photo album of all nine of the children.
She finally realized that she had dominated the entire conversation on her grandchildren.
“Oh, I’ve done all the talking, and I’m so sorry. I know you certainly have something to say. Please, tell me…what do you think of my grandchildren?”
======
Being the office supervisor, I had to have a word with a new employee who never arrived at work on time.
I explained that her tardiness was unacceptable and that other employees had noticed that she was walking in late every day. After listening to my complaints, she agreed that this was a problem and even offered a solution.
“Is there another door I could use?”
======
Adulting is a soup and I am a fork.
======
A pastor goes to a nursing home for the first time to visit an elderly parishioner.
As he is sitting there, he notices a bowl of peanuts beside her bed and takes one. As they continue their conversation, he can’t help himself and eats one after another.
By the time they are through visiting, the bowl is empty. He says, “Mrs. Jones, I’m so sorry, but I seem to have eaten all of your peanuts.”
“That’s okay,” she says. “They would have just sat there anyway. Without my teeth, all I can do is suck the chocolate off and put them back in the bowl.”
======
On dating app: “Princess, having had sufficient experience with princes, seeks frog.”
======
That all for today everyone! I hope you all have very nice Monday!
Muffin.😻
©2024 Muffin McLeod.
We all got up slowly from our chairs, or from lying on the ground as some were, and went around to the front of the home. Dawn had gotten there first and had everyone’s vests ready to put on and the cat’s backpacks too. For some strange reason, my vest was missing, so Sky, Aasta and myself, along with Muffin and Snow, stayed inside the house while the others went to take a look.
It did not take long and the girls returned, and with them fighting like a wild tiger, was a young girl. I could not understand what the girl was saying, but Aasta knew the language right away and began to talk with the girl. The girl settled down immediately when Aasta spoke to her in her own language. We discovered she had come to see if she could find food.
She was incredibly thin, wearing only small worn out shorts. Her family, which included her parents and her older sister, lived about a 2 hour walk away from us. But her mother died last year after getting sick and her father was quite a wild type man ever since she had died. He often beat the girls and only fed them what he had to so they would stay alive and look after him.
Then a couple days ago some people came down the river to their house and offered to buy the two sisters. But the older girl had done something to the boat motor so it would not work. So, the people had to stay until their friends could come and help them. There was a woman who was in charge and she was a very angry woman who always yelled.
She wants to take them back to her home and take pictures of them, but the little girl did not know what that meant. Then their father got drunk last night and one of the new men shot and killed him. She said if she did not get back home those people would hurt her sister. We were all angry by this time and decided to go take a look at the situation.
So, off we went to find the girl’s home. The girls took turns carrying the little girl, who certainly did not weigh much, and we made much better time that way. Once we had the house, or I should say shack, in view, we stopped to look over the situation. We needed the older sister to come out so we could get her away from these new people.
Otherwise they could use her as a shield and perhaps kill her. We waited for a bit, then the little girl said to wait and she ran up to the back of the shack and tapped on the small window. Then she came running back to us. Soon the older sister came out back and the little girl waved for her to come over here. The older sister thought for a moment, then ran fast over to where we were.
But when she saw us, she was terrified. The little girl talked to her, telling her that we were friends and wanted to help them. Aasta then talked with her and that made her much more relaxed. The older sister was only wearing shorts too, so I gave her my T-shirt to wear. I asked if the people could speak English and she said yes. I also asked if there was anything in their house they would like to keep.
She said no to that. Apparently their father had sold anything of value, including all their clothes. Just then a woman came out with 3 men and a huge dog. It was Lauren! Well, she did not come looking for us obviously, but she found us without even knowing it. “This time we stop Lauren, period,” I said, “no chances now.” I stepped out into the clearing.
“Lauren!” I called out, “This is where you stop!” “You!” she called out, “Kill, Jericho, Kill!” The dog came charging and I shot twice, killing the dog. Then my girls came out and began shooting. Lauren and her group were dead. We do have a problem though, she has friends coming to look for her, then they will find us. We put all the bodies inside the cabin and left.
How many friends did Lauren have out here? How many more would be called to help look for us? It would not take them long to find us. Time for a distress signal tonight. Lauren’s friends were supposed to arrive tomorrow, so we do have some time…plus the two sisters to look after. After returning back to our hideaway home, the girls planned a bath for our two new additions, something they certainly needed.
They had clothes for the older sister to wear, she was 19. I had one longer shirt that they made into a nice dress for the little sister who is 9. Neither girl looked as old as they were and both were pretty girls with very white blond hair and dark blue eyes.
While the girls were getting hot water for the bath, I was intrigued by the large medicine cabinet on the wall. I smiled. That is how to get in touch with Mandar in an emergency. However, Sky and Jennifer came and pushed me out so the 2 new girls could bath.
To Be Continued.
©2024 Steve McLeod.