For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Hi, hi everyone!😺 A big oops yesterday, there not any fun funnies for you! Me sleep in too late. But today I remember and here I am. And not to worry, we catch up later with another funnies post too, so you get two today! Hehe!😹 So, here is first funny for you…
A couple were in a busy shopping center.
The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing and as they had a lot to do, she called him on her phone. “Where are you? the wife said. “You know we have lots to do.”
He replied, “Do you remember the jewelers we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with that diamond necklace. I couldn’t afford it at the time, and I said that one day I would get it for you?”
Little tears started to flow down her cheek and she got all choked up. “Yes, I do remember that shop” she replied. “Well, I am in the video game store next to that.”
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A fisherman is walking from the pier carrying lobsters in a bucket. He is approached by the Game Warden who asks him for his fishing license.
The fisherman says, “I did not catch these lobsters, they are my pets. Every day I come and whistle and these lobsters jump out of the water. I take them for a walk and then return them.”
The warden is highly skeptical, so the fisherman says, “If you don’t believe me just watch!” and throws the lobsters into the water.
The warden says, “Now whistle to your lobsters and show me how they jump out of the water.”
The fisherman says, “What lobsters?”
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I hope you enjoy funnies and have nice day too!
Muffin.😻
©2023 Muffin McLeod.
Well, the story is still with Samson and his team, and Kat, with her team, just arrived with Howard. He was the young man who hacked my phone. He had just told Samson that the Sheriff was working with all these other men on some “project” that was making them a lot of money. There was also another two men with them too, a contractor that cleaned up the remains of the house and a woman that worked at the bank.
“Kat, go get those 2, now!” he told her. Howard told her where the contractor lived, he would likely be at home. “You little idiot!” yelled Matt (the major), “Your life is worth nothing now!” Samson went behind his desk again and Jack stood up to confront him. But Samson hit him fast and hard, and the mayor fell to the floor.
“You are in no position to threaten anyone,” said Samson, “if you do not give us Dawn and her boyfriend, your life will be worth nothing, along with your friends here. Maybe we will bury you in the basement of that house.” Kat and her team arrived with the woman from the bank and the contractor. “So, you are the man that tore down the house,” said Samson, “when did you tear it down?”
“Um, I cannot quite remember,” he said. Then the taxi owner, named Carl, held up two fingers and mouthed the word week. “Oh, yeah, it was a couple weeks ago,” he said smiling. Meow.=Him have help from taxi man. Samson went over to him and slapped him hard. Samson wore black leather gloves all the time. “You are a liar like the rest of them,” said Samson.
“They did not tear the house down,” said Howard, “they burned it down 4 days ago. Mayor said it would be faster and since no other houses are close by, it was safe to do.” “Well, well, now we are getting somewhere,” said Samson, “of course you searched the house ahead of time to make sure it was empty, right?” “Why would I do that?” growled Matt, “if anyone was in there they would come running out in a hurry.”
“Unless they were sleeping,” said Mac, “or maybe trapped by you.” “You cannot prove a thing!” he yelled, “And I am not saying anything more!” “Do you know why they wanted Dawn and that PI?” Samson asked Howard. “No, I do not, I think they just wanted to scare that PI away,” he replied, “we did not know he was Dawn’s boyfriend. And when Dawn said she had a lost brother who was big, she should have said he was a giant!”
Rock tried to hard to keep a straight face, but he sure wanted to laugh. “We will leave for an hour and let you people discuss things,” said Samson, “but do not leave here, we will be watching. And we will be back, so you better have some answers for us.” So, off they went and Matt called the sheriff right away and told him to come in a hurry. He did and was surprised to find all of them waiting for him.
They told him what was going on. “I hope you have been feeding those people,” said the sheriff. “What people?” asked Matt. “Are you really that stupid?” asked the sheriff, “I am talking about Dawn and the others!” “Oh, them, I got rid of them,” he said casually. There was silence in the room. “What do you mean?” said Stan, the bank manager.
“I did not want to keep them around here,” he continued, “so I sold them.” Now, Samson had hidden a listening device in the office so the team was listening to every word. This had them in shock! But they continued to listen. “What do you mean, you sold them?” asked the sheriff, “Where are they now?” “I have no idea,” he said, “Howard here went on that weird web thing and posted we had a PI for sale, with a couple of his helpers and 2 cats.
Some guy replied right away. He gave me $100,000 for the PI and $25,000 for each of the helpers. I tossed the cats in for free since he wanted them too.” “You know what will happen to us now when that gangster gets back here,” said Stan, “he will kill us all.” “Maybe not,” said the sheriff, “what was the name of the guy who bought them?”
“Ask Howard,” said Matt, “I do not remember, and he handled the sale.” All eyes were on Howard now. “He never gave his name actually,” said Howard, “just kind of a nickname, I think. He said his name was Ohio. 3 men in a helicopter came and picked them up, gave me the money and left. None of them said a word, it was scary.”
“There, see, we have a name to give that guy,” said Matt enthusiastically. “Ohio is not a name, you idiot,” said the sheriff shaking his head, “those people are likely dead by now.” “And we will be dead when that gangster gets back!” said Stan nervously, “I never should have gotten involved in this deal.” Now to our team who are listening to all of this. “Ohio,” said Mac, “and Toledo…”
To Be Continued.
©2023 Steve McLeod.