For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Hi everyone! I hope you are all feeling well today. It’s rather chilly and icy here today, a good day for staying indoors, with a cup of coffee and a good laugh. So, I decided to share more of my collection of jokes. Here you go, enjoy!
A man came into the pharmacy and said to the technician, “Do you have anything that will stop hiccups?”
The tech leaned over the counter and slapped the man’s face.
The man said “What did you do that for?”
The tech replied, “Well, you don’t have any hiccups now, do you?”
The man replied, “I never did. I came in for my wife out in the car.”
I was told that 70% of the population is not smart. I’m obviously with the other 40%.
A person calls a pet store: “Send me thirty-thousand cockroaches, at once.”
Astonished clerk: “What in the world do you want with thirty-thousand cockroaches?”
Caller: “I’m moving out today, and my lease says I must leave the premises in exactly the same condition I found them.”
You know you’re a bad cook when your doctor instructs you to eat out more often.
My boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect. Later that morning he went out and got a small sign that read, “I’m the Boss.” He then taped it to his office door.
Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said: “Your wife called. She wants you to bring her sign back.”
On the way to preschool, a doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it.
Be still, my heart, thought the doctor, my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps and be a doctor!
Then the child spoke into the instrument: “Welcome to McDonald’s. May I take your order?”
That’s all for this time, hopefully you were able to get a chuckle or two. More will be shared in the future. I hope your day is great and God bless!
Steve and Muffin.
© 2019 Steve McLeod.
Haha!!! I loved this!
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Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it!
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You’re welcome!
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Thanks. Ooops, forgot, not supposed to say thanks. Forget I said thanks when I wasn’t supposed to say thanks when I said thanks though I wasn’t supposed to say thanks so just pretend I never said thanks after I said thanks which I wasn’t supposed to do.😵🤯
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Yep!!! At least you’re learning something good from me!
How’s Dusty doing?
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I am? What’s that?🤔🤔🤔⛄🌲
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Remembering things I’ve said in the past!
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Oh, was that you that said that?🤔 How about that.😃 I really am smarter than I look.😀😎
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Yeah yeah yeah!
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🤔🤔🤔
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Hehehehe!
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Good jokes! My favourite was the last one.
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Yeah, that one was good! Thanks for reading Sheree! Hope your day is going well!😁😸⛄🌲
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It is thanks and your’s too I hope.
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It is a good day indeed.🙂😺
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These are great, just what I needed! 😀
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Hi Laura! Thanks for stopping by, glad you liked these! I hope you have a great evening!😃😺
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🙂🙂
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I especially like the second joke ! Sounds like me !
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hehe! Glad you enjoyed them!😂😹
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😂😂😂
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Glad you liked it Ross! Enjoy your day!😄😸
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You too!
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Thanks Ross!
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Ha ha ha 😂😂😂 First one is hilarious😉😜😁 30 thousand cockroaches🙄🤯 ewww.. but a nice joke…😁 haha your wife called for sign 😂😂😂👌 Last one is ultimately awesome “Welcome to McDonalds” Its a bunch of laugh Steve… Enjoyed it, ✨😉 have a beautiful day ✨🤗
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Hi Simon! Glad you enjoyed these jokes, a little laughter during the day is always a good thing.😂😂😹 A cold start to my day, it’s -9C this morning,🥶 but at least not much wind. Still so much ice, dangerous out there.😲 Thanks for reading Simon and your great comment.😀😀 I hope you have a wonderful evening!😃🌙
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each one of these was great; thanks for the laughs. 🙂
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You’re welcome and thanks for coming by to read! It’s always good to have some laughter in our day. Happy Thanksgiving!
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🙈😜🙃
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😀😀😀
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Love every short story. But especially the second one. May I please have your permission to share it in my Instagram? I’ll credit you and link back to your blog.
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Sure, you can share whatever you like Jessica. Glad you liked them, and thanks for stopping by!😀😺⛄🌲
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