For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Hi everyone on this cool Monday morning! Are you ready for some laughs? Giggles perhaps? Maybe a smile? Well, we hope you get at least one from today’s selection, so let’s get smiling…
A heavy snowstorm closed the schools in one town.
When the children returned to school a few days later, one grade school teacher asked her students whether they had used the time away from school constructively.
“I sure did, teacher,” one little girl replied. “I prayed for more snow.”
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A boy asks his father to explain the differences among irritation, aggravation, and frustration. Dad takes out his cell phone and dials a number at random.
When the phone is answered he asks, “Can I speak to Roger, please?”
“No! There’s no one called Roger here.”
The person hangs up.
“That’s irritation,” says the dad.
He picks up the phone again, dials the same number and asks for Roger a second time. “No, there’s no one here called Roger. Go away. Don’t call again.”
“That’s aggravation,” says Dad.
“Then what’s frustration?” asks his son.
The father picks up his phone and dials a third time: “Hello, this is Roger. Have I received any phone calls?”
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Why must I prove I am me when I call to pay my bill? Do strangers call to pay my bills? If so, why don’t you let them?
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Your shadow is confirmation that light has traveled nearly 93 million miles unobstructed, only to be deprived of reaching the ground in the last few feet thanks to you.
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I had a job offer from a large company and they offered to fly me out to the interview on business class.
During the return flight we were given gourmet brownies and cookies. Not hungry, I decided to save them for later, so I placed them in an airsickness courtesy bag.
After the plane landed, I got up to leave and a flight attendant approached me if I wanted her to dispose of the bag.
I said, “No thanks, I’m saving it for my kids.”
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That’s it for today everyone, we hope you have a marvelous Monday and God bless!
Steve and Muffin.
Β©2021 Steve McLeod.
Hahaha βΊοΈ I can see the face of the flight attendant π π Thank you Steve ππ Hope you’re feeling better! π»
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Glad you got a chuckle today Ribana! I’m getting there slowly. Have a great week!ππ»πππΉ
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ππΉππΉππΉ
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Glad you got a chuckle from these Rossana!ππΉπββ
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I’ll send you a list of my bill’s you can pay!ππππππππ
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That is a good one!ππΉππΉ
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I thought you might like it. Driving home now. On I’ll be on in an hour or so.ππ
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Okay, I’ll be here or there or somewhere in between.π
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Hey ya tweener!!πππ
How ya doing?
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Is that question a real question?π€ Or is that question a greeting?π³ So hard to tell these days.π€―
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It’s kinda both..π€ ππ
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Now I’m not sure if I should answer it or not, so I’ll answer it half way. Thank you,π I’m feeling!π³π¬π²π€―
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Then I’ll half answer you… That’s πππππ
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You’re laughing at me. Sniff.
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Not really laughingππ
More like a little snicker?? π€π€ Hehehe
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Oh, that’s okay then. Did you get a chance to read chapter one yet?π€πΊ
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Not yet… it wasn’t out before I left work and when I got home I was busy with supper and cutting up veggies for my salads this week. So….brb!πππ
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Good for you! Nice to have that kind of energy after working all day that you can make a whole week of food in one evening! I have trouble making a whole meal of food after doing nothing.π³π³π³πππ
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It was just a few peppers and some lettuce.. but supper was the real work.
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Peppers and lettuce is a salad?π€
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Okay.. add cucumbers π₯ and lettuce and some deli meatπ
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Now you’re talking! Every salad needs cucumbers!ππ₯π₯π ππ
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Yepper diddlydoo!!π€ͺπ€ͺ
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Oh ya, sunflower seeds
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Hmm, never tried sunflower seeds in a salad.
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It’s the pits I guess they might be called the little seed inside the shell.
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If you don’t like them, why use them?π€
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Oh I like them! They give a little different texture and some protein.
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Must be the squirrels are getting to you.ππ
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They did that a long time ago!!π€¨πππ
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Soon you’ll be out there fighting them for the acorns.ππ
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I doubt it! I’ll just cut down the oak trees and all the acorns go away along with the squirrels!!ππππ€π€π€π€π€
Yay!!! Whoop whoop!!π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£π€£
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I think the squirrels are visiting you at night and whispering in your ear “I want to eat acorns, I want to eat acorns, I want to eat acorns”. And soon it will be “Acorns roasting on a BBQ…πΆππ
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I’ll be nuts alright… just chestnuts!!π€£π€£π€£π€£πππππππ€π€π€π€π€
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Acorns.πππππ
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Chestnuts acorns they’re all the same to squirrels!!
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See? It’s working already!πππΉπΉ
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That’s alright!! I don’t eat them anyway!πππ
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Oh sure, now you want to put the chestnut growers out of business. Creating all that unemployment, the growers going bankrupt, their kids not able to go to university, having to live on the streets because they can only get a minimum wage job, living in cardboard box homes under the bridge. Just because you don’t like chestnuts! (I borrowed this one from Abbot and Costello)πππΉπΉ
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They need to diversify their income then!ππππ
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They’re already spreading it out between all their kids. How diversified do you want?ππ
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Doesn’t matter what I want… πππ
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That’s what I say too, but no one listens to me.ππ
That time of night again. Good night Dusty!πππ΄π΄
Don’t sleep in tomorrow.π
Talk again tomorrow.π
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I’m glad I’m not alone in not being heard!!π€π€
Good Night Steve!!
Sleep Well!
Tomorrow’s a new day with new conversations!ππ Good Night
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π
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Oh yeah, grape tomatoes and dressing!πππ
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I like the way you make salads!ππ
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Sometimes I put cheese on it. It’s the white cheese I forget the name.
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Oh yeah, cheese! That’s the perfect topper!
Ghost cheese? Terrified cheese?
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Yep!
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I love the βI prayed for more snowβ π
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Glad you got a chuckle from it Susie!ππΉ
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Anything that puts a smile on my face is great π
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Hopefully we can do that more!ππΊ
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Thanks for these I needed a chuckle this morning
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Sometimes You just gotta laugh
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Glad you enjoyed them Mr. Ohh!ππΉ
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Great chuckles ! The expression on the grackleβs face is hilarious ! βοΈβοΈππ»βοΈβοΈπ
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Happy you got some chuckles today!ππΉ
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You’re saving it for your kids?
Roger that!
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That would get quite the look from the flight attendant!
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π
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