For a smile as wide as a country sunrise
Hi everyone!πΊπ I back again with some middle of week fun time so you can have fun with my fun time fun! Yesterday I was about to go sleep on favorite chair of mine when my human pull stool thing across floor. It make horrible kind of noise which nearly scare all of my fur right off me! He smile and say, “oops, sorry Muffin.” That when we have “discussion time”. That more serious than when we have “conversation time.” He yell more when we have discussions. Very embarrassing really. Oh well, he not limping so bad this morning. Well, time for fun funny…
UPDATED EMPLOYEE HANDBOOK Effective immediately…
DRESS CODE:
It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing $600 Prada sneakers and carrying a $1200 Gucci Bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress in-between, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
SICK DAYS:
We will no longer accept a doctor statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
SURGERY:
Operations are now banned. As long as you are an employee here, you need all your organs. You should not consider removing anything. We hired you intact. To have something removed constitutes a breach of employment.
PERSONAL DAYS:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday & Sunday.
VACATION DAYS:
All employees will take their vacation at the same time every year. The vacation days are as follows: January 1, July 4 & December 25.
ABSENCE DUE TO YOUR OWN DEATH:
This will be accepted as an excuse. However, we require at least two weeks notice as it is your duty to train your own replacement.
RESTROOM USE:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the restroom. In the future, we will follow the practice of going in alphabetical order. For instance, all employees whose names begin with ‘A’ will go from 8:00 to 8:20; employees whose names begin with ‘B’ will go from 8:20 to 8:40 and so on. If you’re unable to go at your allotted time, it will be necessary to wait until the next day when your turn comes again.
In extreme emergencies, employees may swap their time with a coworker. Both employee’s supervisors must approve this exchange in writing. In addition, there is now a strict 3-minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will be taken.
After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the “Chronic Offenders” category.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation and input should be directed elsewhere.
Have a nice week.
The Management
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This is a long one, so only get the one today. Hope everyone having good week!
Muffin.π»
Β©2024 Muffin McLeod.
Well, we have had a nice 2 week break with nothing happening, so we could really relax and enjoy ourselves a bit for a change. The girls have been helping Honey and Agata a lot. And we have Penny teaching Agata since she was a teacher before. All we needed to do was get some books, etc, for them to use.
Aasta is teaching both the girls English and Honey is sitting in with Agata for school as well since she did not go to school past grade 5 and Agata has never been in school at all. It took a bit of convincing to get her to agree with going to school at first, but when Honey joined her and Aasta was there too, then it was okay. Sky will join in sometimes too.
The girls have really accepted her as their mom and me as dad, or daddy actually. Sky and I are enjoying our new roles as parents. We decided against sending Agata to regular school since it would be too hard to protect her there and I am sure our enemies would love to get their hands on her. Miles and Brook are getting along very well and I am expecting them to get engaged soon.
Penny is trying hard to get Matt’s attention, but she does not seem to be doing too well. Matt is a widower and perhaps he does not want to get married again, so I talked to Sapphire about it. She was thrilled to know that Penny was interested in her dad. “I think she has gone past the interested stage,” I told her, “she can barely eat or sleep right now.”
So Sapphire was going to talk with a couple other girls and maybe they can help her dad wake up and see Penny. I hope they do not go overboard though. But she started slow by asking her dad to join her and her friends for a walk. When they started out Matt was walking beside Sapphire, but when they came back he was walking beside Penny, and holding hands too.
I must ask Sapphire what happened. Then one day Penny got a phone call from an old high school friend of ours, named Hope Less (Less was her last name). Who names their child Hope Less? She was often called Crazy Hopeless. “That is the girl who used to do crazy things, correct?” I asked. “And you did not?” she asked in return. “Oh, I need to hear details later,” said Sky excitedly. Sigh.
“Well, Hope and 2 friends bought some land which was supposed to be vacant,” Penny continued, “but it has a big, old abandoned house on it and everyone in the area calls it the death house. Apparently the original owners died in the house one winter, so their son inherited the house and when he went to look at it one weekend he never came back.
The police found him dead too with not a mark on him. The coroner said he died of a heart attack, just like his parents. “Anyway, Hope and her girlfriends want to keep the land since it is so beautiful out there,” continued Penny, “but they are afraid of the house and were wondering if we could check it out for them.”
“It could just be that heart attacks run in that family,” I said, “there may not be anything sinister about it.” “Well, 2 hikers stayed in it once too and the police found them 8 months later in that house, dead,” added Penny, then looking at me with those big eyes she said, “Can we please investigate, just to make sure there is no problems with the place? Um, they do not have much money though.”
“Naturally,” said Baldwin, “but who needs money these days, we will gladly look into it for them, absolutely free.” “Oh, thank you Mr. B!” exclaimed Penny and she ran back to her room to call Hope. “I was being sarcastic,” said Baldwin slowly. Then he gave his characteristic huge sigh. “Well, it is not likely anything wrong with the place way out there,” I said, “just coincidences, so it should not take us long to find out the problem.
Rock, you and Matt stay behind as backup, just in case.” I picked my team which would have Kat, Jennifer, Marlena, Kristina, Dawn, Kera and Ginnifer. From the guys I picked Aari, Mac and John. We also brought Muffin, Storm, Rusty, Jewel, Ginger and Tiger. “Do you think Hope will remember you Steve?” asked Sky. That got Penny laughing loud and long. Very strange.
“She was chasing after Steve all through high school,” said Penny, still laughing. “Hmm, you need a wife Steve,” said Sky. Jennifer pushed Dawn’s arm up right away. “Good, thanks for volunteering Dawn,” said Sky, “you have not played Steve’s wife yet, so this will be perfect for you.” “Sneaky,” Dawn whispered to Jennifer.
To Be Continued.
Β©2024 Steve McLeod.